• © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

  • © Graziela Diez

The Mother in Me is the Mother in You

Felizitas Stilleke & Friends

»…as a woman, 37 – tick tock tick tock, wtf – single, childless – who makes up words like that? – divorced, I am apparently looking for – hahaha, no way, nothing! – Although nevertheless, I am urgently looking for a way out of the binary thinking that says someone is a mother or not – or has to become one to become something – or was it exactly the other way around ?…«

Are mothers legible? Is mother a verb? Where in the body sits the desire to have children? Why is it possible on Tinder to specify „has no children, but may want some“ but not „has no children, but may not want any“? Is motherhood choice or something that just (doesn’t) happen? What pauses at menopause? Do mothers who have abortions mutate? Can queer narratives overcome the patriarchal either/or, pros and cons?

In the sessions, there will be a gamble for everything and then for nothing. The encounters belong to a year-long research that now goes from the private to a public, leaving nothing out: environment, sexuality, work, politics, money, career, love and simply life – because no topic does not end up with motherhood.

New session with Linda Fisahn, Christian Fleck & Lis Marie Diehl
June 2, 2022, 6.00 pm

After what feels like a hundred years, three members of the theater group I CAN BE YOUR TRANSLATOR meet again on the Reeperbahn and welcome the newborn baby, uncover the secrets of the father-to-be, and process together how things can and will continue with children and career. Head cinema guaranteed!

Session with Annett & Ari Hardegen:
As long as Ari (16) puts his feet under Annett’s (52) table, there are no taboos. And when Felizitas (38) joins them, they add a big load of sushi and the desire to chat together across generations and classifications. With open ears and mostly full mouths.
Link to the podcast

Session with Smruthi Gargi Eswar (English):
Divorced, childless, single… Although Smu and Felizitas share all these attributes, they have never talked about them as friends. It’s time to do so and dream up an image of motherhood that also has a place for non-mothers.
Link to the podcast
Look here for more about Felizitas‘ encounter with Smu and her »Sister Misfortune« tarot card set..

Session with Daniel Ernesto Müller-Torres:
On a Greek island Daniel and Felizitas locate not only their friendship, but also their vision of a Chosen Family. It is the story of a rainbow family with all its resolutions, separations and debates that has made its way here. Underwater Love!
Link to the podcast

Session with Monika Gintersdorfer
interview with Ordinateur & Alex Cephus
When is motherhood responsible?, Monika asks herself for a very long time in her life and comes to an important realization for her (too) late. Together with Felizitas, she looks back on her eventful life and wanders questioningly through relationship landscapes across continents.
Link to the podcast

Session with Philine Velhagen:
As the first and so far only biological mother in this series, Philine invites you to a playful confrontation around the female cycle and the „clubs“ of the like-minded and renegades. It will be painful, but also liberating – how could it be otherwise?
Link to the podcast

Session with Thais di Marco
interview with Ekedi Gunzolandê & Ekedi Gueregy (in English)
Thais!Kaloya!Nobody! has many names. So does her approach to motherhood. As a member of the Brazilian Candomblé community, she provides exciting insights from a diasporic world where motherhood roots itself in a community quite differently than Felizitas is able to even think.
Link to the podcast

Past Dates
  • Dec 14, 2022


Thais di Marco, Philine Velhagen, Smruthi Gargi Eswar, Monika Gintersdorfer, Daniel Ernesto Müller-Torres uvm.

by and with

Felizitas Stilleke

Sounddesign, music

Miguel Toro. Christian Fleck (Session Smu & Sessions 4 + 7), Björn Stegmann (Sessions 5 + 6)

Jingle & vocals song session 5


Voice jingle


Set design

Anahí Pérez


Matthias Krause, Sebastian Pablo Poloni

Production management

Franziska Janke

Thanks to

Bettina Andrae, barner16, George Demir, Daniela Dröscher, Louis Häming, Marc Fischer, Martje Friedrich, Dr. Colin Kehrer, Anja Kreher, Sarah Israel, Julia Knopp, Elisa Liepsch, Peggy Mädler, Gabriel Milliet, Maria Nübling, Tina Pfurr, Antje Prust, Wilma Renfordt, Ben J. Riepe, Maria Rößler, Merel Smitt, Sandra Umathum, Avril Stormy Unger, Anna-Lena Wenzel, das Team der ocelot Buchhandlung Berlin, die Crew vom Ballhaus Ost und meine (Wal-)Familie


A production by Felizitas Stilleke in cooperation with Ballhaus Ost. Funded by Hauptstadtkulturfonds, District Office Pankow, Office for Further Education and Culture – Department of Arts and Culture – and a working and research grant of the Berlin Senate Department for Culture and Europe. Resumption 2022 funded by the #TakeHeart program of Fonds Darstellende Künste with funds from the Federal Government Commissioner for Culture and the Media as part of NEUSTART Kultur.